CHILD’S PROTECTION AGAINST SEXUAL ABUSE

Child's protection against sexual abuse

Child's protection against sexual abuse

The cases of  children being sexually abused by Paedophiles(an adult who is sexually attracted to  children) is prevalent in the society we live in today. Research has it that 1 out of 3 female children, is  sexually abused before the age of 18,while 1 out of 5 boys suffers the same fate. Therefore the  need  for child’s protection against sexual abuse in the  world today cannot be over-emphasized.

   Parents always tell their children “don’t talk to strangers” to prevent  issues like  sexual abuse, kidnapping ,trafficking  etc., but the irony of this statement is that most perpetrators of these acts are mostly the  people we know or trust. There’s an adage from the western part of Nigeria(Yoruba dialect)which  says, “Kokoro to je efor,idi efor lo wa”.This simply means that “the insect eating a vegetable is just at the roots of the vegetable”.

    There was an incidence that occurred some years back ,an Adolescent girl who had just finished her JUNIOR WAEC(West Africa Examination Council) Exams,was asked by her parents to go  spend time with her Dad’s sister who was well to do while she awaited her results. Few months later,she was rushed back home by her aunt,that she had attempted suicide. It was later found out that while  she was with her aunt,  her cousin(her aunt’s elder son)always came to her room  every night to sexually abuse her.Few weeks later she became pregnant and her aunt secretly did an abortion for her and asked her not to tell anybody.The incidence with the cousin still continued until she became pregnant a second time and then she attempted suicide. Fortunately for her, the aunt had been around on that faithful day.This was how the parents got to know and the girl almost lost her life. The incident was closed, because  the girl’s father said, “It was a Family matter”.

 MEANING OF CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE:

This is also called child molestation,this occurs when an adult engages in sexual activities with a child.It can occur in a variety of settings,including home ,school,or work(in a place where child labor is common).

SIGNS OF A CHILD THAT HAS BEEN MOLESTED

   There are two major signs a parent would have to look out for :-

  1. EMOTIONAL SIGNS

  2. PHYSICAL SIGNS

 

  •  EMOTIONAL SIGNS

1. WITHDRAWN: A child that has been sexually abused will be withdrawn.A child that is normally vibrant and extroverted would suddenly start keeping to himself or herself.

2. DEPRESSION : depression is also a tell tale sign of a child that has been molested,sudden unhappiness  that spansfor a long time.

3. NIGHTMARES: this kind of incidence is traumatic,children could have series of   nightmares.

 4.HOSTILITY : the child could become uncharacteristically unfriendly and rash.

 5. UNEASINESS WHEN THEY COME IN CONTACT WITH THE PERPITRATOR: If the criminal is    within the environs,the child will always be apprenhensive when the individual is around .

  • PHYSICAL SIGNS

  I.SWELLING AND REDNESS OF THE GENITALS.

 2.BODY PAIN AND WEAKNESS

 3.SEXUAL BEHAIVOUR THAT IS NOT ACCEPTABLE:

 4.RISK OF INFECTIONS vaginal yeast infections in children

child's protection against sexual abuse

HOW TO HELP A CHILD WHO HAS BEEN SEXUALLY ABUSED

 1. Listen to them and believe them ,when they confide in you(70% never open up)

 2. Do not be judgemental,support and show them love.

 3. Continue to reassure them  that they are safe.

 4. Seek medical help and counselling for child.

  5. As much as possible,bring culprit to book,if you finally discover them.

 

HOW CAN I PROTECT MY CHILD FROM SEXUAL ABUSE:

1. TALK TO YOUR CHILD ABOUT THEIR BODY PARTS EARLY AND THERE SHOULDN’T BE ANY BODY SECRETS: Start early to tell your kids about their body parts,(not in a vulgar manner)as early as 2-3yrs.They should know that some parts are private and should be covered and not to be touched by anyone with exceptions to Mommy ,Daddy or a Doctor. Moreover they should not touch anyone’s private parts too .Furthermore if any one touches their body parts in an offensive manner,they should report to you immediately.Some of the paedophiles are very very sly,when they start the gradual sexual harassment by touching kids secretly,they will always tell the child,”make sure you don’t tell your mummy and daddy or anybody about our play, or our play would stop and all the goodies I do get you”.

2. DONT NICKNAME THEIR BODY PARTS: Their body parts should be said,the way it is.Some parents will nickname their body parts,example the penis as “Pipi”,this is wrong,don’t get them confused as they grow up.Some parents might find this awkward ,but its for their own good.

3. BE YOUR CHILD’S CONFIDANTE: Learn to always ask and know how their day went at school and  home even if u are not around.The bottom line is that you should be your child’s best friend.Make them know that they will not get into trouble if they tell you something serious.

4.YOU SHOULD DO A PROPER SCREENING OF HOUSE HELPS AND DRIVERS :There should be a thorough background check on care givers and drivers before you absolve them into your home.Make sure you know them up to their homes.21 home safety rules for children

5. MAKE SURE HOME TUTORS ARE SCREENED AND POSSIBLY HIRED BASED ON REFERRAL: Most at times parents are not home when home tutors come around, so make sure you get a trusted and well screened tutor.

6.THE ISSUE OF YOUR KIDS SLEEPING OUT SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN LIGHTLY: before you allow your kids sleep over a neighbour’s,friend’s or relative’s house make sure you know the sleeping arrangement and be sure of who you are handing your kids to.

7.ALWAYS KNOW YOUR CHILDREN’S  WHERE ABOUT : Don’t allow kids wander like sheep without a sherpherd.At all times, try to know your kids where about.

8.BE GROUNDED ON SEX EDUCATION,SO YOU WILL BE ABLE TO EDUCATE YOUR KIDS : You can only give what you have, so in order to properly educate your children on this issue, talk to other parents and professionals to be well grounded.

9.BE PROACTIVATE AS A PARENT : Learn to read “in between lines” as a parent , especially mothers. Women tend to have strong intuitions on matters relating to their families. They should be able to have sound discernment of people around them.

    FINAL NOTES: It is not the duty of a child to fend away molesters because they are still young,highly impressionable and innocent.It is the  duty of parents to make sure their children are shielded from every harm .

 

 

     Please feel free to comment or give your valuable contributions.

10 Comments

  1. I love this platform and will like to connect with it because there are lot of sexually abused children around my area who need help but I can’t do much in helping them.so how can I join this platform and serve as help to this children?thanks

    1. Thanks, sir for this contribution.Its indeed an epidemic in the world today,cases of kids being molested and the society turning a blind eye to it.You can still do your quota by creating awareness in your own little sphere or area.Cases of this manner should be reported to the necessary authorities and the culprits brought to book.The “Close your mouth syndrome”,should be eradicated from the minds of these victims,and this can only be done by GREAT AWARENESS.Thanks again for contributions.Please subscribe and never miss a post.

  2. Medina I must say this is beautiful.the content that you bring is very deep and it has its own deep spiritual tone.its even written in the bible that parents should have time for their kids. But with the fast pacing world we live in its really difficult for parents. But this blog that you have created will serve as a timely reminder for parents. Even lower animals that are giving attention feel emotionally good.keep up the good work.

  3. Nice write ups and initiative. Sister Joan, I love the good job you’re doing. In my practice, I’ve had to attend to many cases of child abuse. Several cases are really out there unreported. I want to use this opportunity to educate the general public that agencies abounds that defends child’s rights but people aren’t aware. Do you know of any child suffering an abuse? Report to child protection agency. Sorry can’t lay my hands on their contacts for Now. Search them up on Google, they’re doing amazing jobs.

    1. Thanks sir, for this immense contribution.Like you said,so many cases of child molestatation are out there unreported,either because of fear,public stigma or ignorance.Cases of this sort,should be reported promptly and culprits apprehended instead of allowing them roam freely.I know that if such cases are reported at the police stations,they will take it from there to contact or hand the case over to the necessary Child Protection Agencies.Thanks again sir,please subscribe and never miss a post.

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